the toddler diet

I have done it, ladies (and gentlemen, too). I have come up with the newest and best diet around. It's called the toddler diet. It's very simple, once you get started. To begin, you just have to have a baby--very simple, right? Then you have to raise that baby for about a year--no problem, huh? Then comes the diet.
You see, toddlers don't understand that when Mommy eats something, she doesn't want to share. So anything you eat, the toddler wants to eat. And since we all want our sweet little darlings to stay away from the chocolate addictions of Mommy's, your snacking and eating habbits must drastically change. I went from eating cocoa krispies and those extra sugary milk and cereal bars, to eating whole grain waffles for breakfast. And if your toddler is like mine, he is a garbage disposal and will eat your waffle, too.
And so, all you need to do to lose weight is follow these three easy steps:
1. have a baby
2. raise him/her for a year
3. share all your food with him/her

Ok, in all seriousness, my eating habbits really have changed a ton. If I never eat another whole grain waffle again, it will be too soon. OK, I hear my little garbage disposal calling me again. Bet he's hungry!